... I've been asked that alot, and I've found it to be a bittersweet question to answer. Of course everyone who has ever been here falls in love with what this city continually has to offer. The energy, the excitement, the rush... it's all very thrilling don't get me wrong. But once the touristy 'honeymoon' ends so to speak, and the sacrifices you've made to become a resident here start to sink in, I've found that the love I have for this city is challenged on a daily basis.
I think we all have preconceived notions and expectations of New York thanks largely to the media. We're constantly inundated with images of the city through television and the movies and as a result we feel as though we know it, like we've experienced it without ever having felt it. It's all very baffling because despite seeing it so often, we don't really know it at all. It's very different, living it, being fully exposed to the rawness of it. I think that is what has been the most eye-opening aspect of my time here thus far.
I love how New York is such a walker-friendly city; a great excuse to get out and explore, see and do more than you can possibly imagine. But oh how I miss my car and the convenience of having my own transportation. Nowadays, my daily transportation involves being smushed into a severely overcrowded subway car, desperately hoping that the volume on my iPod will drown out the sound of the crazy homeless guy publicly preaching his religious values, rapping about God, then singing Feliz Navidad. I recall that being a day that I felt so unbelievably anxious to escape the position I was in, that I jumped off the train as soon as I could, preferring to walk the remaining 30 blocks home instead.
I love the proximity of everything here; you can step out of your apartment building and be just steps away from anything you could possibly need... great deli's, amazing restaurants, unique shops... Starbucks. On the downside though, I miss having S P A C E... personal space, breathing space, mental space, green space... a place to escape space.
I love never being bored. More importantly, I love that the opportunities still exist, at my age, for me to continue to pursue my two passions in life, dance and music. I'm not sure I love the feeling of utter exhaustion I experience every day from my chosen desire to jam-pack my days, but it's definitely one sacrifice that's been more than worth it.
I love the people I work with and the family-like environment they've welcomed me into, but man do I miss the people I care about most. I can't express how much I miss the great company of my amazing friends, having my sister be by my side as a motivating factor in an intense dance class, going shopping with my partner-in-crime... my Mom has an eye for deals unlike anyone I know, and talking shop (i.e. cars) over coffee at Timmy's with my Dad.
So do I love New York? Yes I do... you have to to be able to survive in this town when you're on your own. What I don't love... not having the presence of my family and friends within arms reach distance to lean on. I know the support is there though, and is just a phone call or e-mail or perhaps a visit away, which means more than anything. So with each passing day, I'm adjusting to change and learning to accept a completely different lifestyle than what I've known for years. Time will tell if my 'love' for this city will keep me here after my internship is complete. But since I don't have to make that decision for awhile yet, for the time being, I'll continue to make the most of this once in a lifetime adventure... accepting the good and tolerating the bad, as I fulfill my personal reasons for being here and explore what else it is that I'm looking for.
It was a very exciting weekend for me to be able to reunite with some familiar faces from home; the ever-fantastic Darka and Brad, my mentors from Bottom Line Productions!
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